Melting under Blue Skies :]
Friday, April 18, 2008


I'll be blogging here for a moment. Apparently, my current blog has been invaded by my mother on the daily basis and I can't like write with freedom anymore. Like if I rant about home, she'll totally talk to me about it, and the conversation will like take hours... just because she read it from my blog, which on the other hand was insanely humiliating. I did put a lot of ranting on that blog, like, everything... from my personal problems and some other things that should be kept a secret :)) Its annoying & fcked up at the same time. See world, almost my life on the daily basis has been filed on that blog. I can barely visit my blog and look at the stuff. Because I felt really really embarrassed. Now if you try to visit it, it wouldn't be available anymore. I didn't deleted it (duh, I wouldn't... its too good to be, hahaha), I just made it for private viewing only. And by private, I mean only one person can view it-- moi. Its too bad that I have to abandon that blog, and thus blogging at the same time for a few days already. Really. Especially right now that I'm in the verge of enthusiasm-- and totally inspired :)) :)) Besides, this week has been errr, devastating, tragic & fcked up at the same time. See, I am suppose to blog about those :)) But I can't :| Now that sucks.

Five days seem to fly really fast. I started my review for college entance exam last Monday, and now its already Friday :) TGIF :P I am taking review classes, like what I've said, for college- everyday for one month. I am in the morning session, and my brother was on the afternoon. Mine was 8 am to 11 am (but this week, we've been dismissed as early as 10:30) and his was at around 1 pm something. By the time I'll arrive home, he'll be gone. Its amazing, we hardly meet at our house :)) I love it :)) He's taking review with his other schoolmates (the MunSci people) and I am taking mine with the San Beda people :)) :)) I didn't count how many are we in class, but all I know is that only 3 students are not from Beda (I, Cheekz *my classmate at SMS*, and this guy seating at our table). Its fine having the class with them because its not required naman to converse and mingle with them. And even it is, believe me, I won't :)) The San Beda people are having the review with their friends, so that explains why they've been so rowdy and noisy every time. At every breaktime, they'll talk & laugh and do stuff, you know, like what normal friends do. Hello, OP totally :)) Too bad for me, my friends were taking their review on other places. Tsk :| And oh, when we answer stuff, they usually get high scores. Quite intimidating because I usually get the lowest :(( Sob. Its fine for me though. I believe that the whole point of taking a review is to learn new things, and not to make everything a big of a deal. Sigh. And they usually ask questions whenever they didn't got what the teacher has been discussing. Quite impressive actually, because their questions actually make sense. Lol for that :)) I remember last Monday, we (my kasabay & I) sat at their table. And this girl named Erika was playing some songs from her cellphone, and crap, its too loud and quite distracting because at that time we're answering stuff in English. I don't like her that much, she seems so malandi. Believe me, she is. She looks like one. SLUTTY FACTOR :)) :)) Parang hindi taga San Beda lang ang itsura eh. I don't know, its bad to judge someone but hey you're not in control of me :)) :)) Anyway. We've been tackling Biology & Chemistry this week. Newsflash, I suck at both :)) :)) :)) I usually make hula when we have to answer the book, LoL. THANK GOD, its in multiple choice form. So HALLELUJAH for that :)) :)) Who can blame me, some questions on the book has not yet been tackled at school- at our school specifically. I don't think that it's for me to blame if San Beda has advance education for students in the higher section and if their Chemistry books were thinner than ours :)) LoL, the thinner the more summarized... the easier to get understood. Well, for me though :)) Wah nevermind :|

Did I mention that I'm having this review with a friend? She's not actually a friend-friend (you know what I mean). So I guess the term "friend" was inappropriate, sorry :)) She's my neighbor and our mothers thought it'll be best if we take the review together. We hardly talk to each other. Its awkward. Can't explain anymore. Its really not my thing to mingle with her. She's nice and all, but hey, the bottom line here is were not even friends so... that. So mean :)) This week has been argghhh.

Next week, we're having Math. I suck at that more :)) :)) :)) I missed English. Darn. Because we only attended the review just this week, and they already finished English last week. So its sad :(( I believe its the only subject I understand. I don't know, I simply like it. Although I am not bragging or telling you at some point that I know English. I just love learning it. Its really good and the fact that I understand it more than the other subjects makes me feel so happy :))

At home, I usually do nothing except sleeping & eating. I hardly go out with friends because, I don't know, people here at home are suspicious :)) :)) Even you're not doing anything they think "you're" up with something. I've been stripped from having my privacy & freedom rights. People are fcker, trying to know every single thing you do. LIKE LEAVE ME ALONE I GOT MY OWN LIFE. Its really annoying. So I've been acting kinda annoying to them lately. Well, I hope they do think I am bratty. Panindigan na kung baga. I am trying to have the time of my life this last summer I'm having as a highschool student. But it will be too impossible. Its not depression I'm experiencing, its sadness... extreme sadness. Is that a longer term for depression already? :)) :)) I got some disorder. I am forgetting to smile & laugh. I just can't. Everything was not right. Too complex. I can't handle it, I can't even find the right solutions for my problems. I am diseased so badly. S.O.S! :] I am trying though. I am doing every single thing that I think will make me happy. I did. Its effective :]


You brighten my day
Showin' me my direction
You're comin' to me
And givin' me inspiration
How can I ask for more
From you my dear
Maybe just a smile in your heart
--
THANK YOU super :)


P.S I think we're really going to Bora. OH CRAP. I wouldn't be here on my birthday though. Why oh why :|


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online hits Arigato :)








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